THE BALANCING ACT

Building Balance for Better Living

January 2005

by Brent O'Bannon, MBS

(Author, Speaker, Counselor/Coach)

Do you know what we have in common with batman, the joker and the lone ranger? You may be surprised. We have a hero within, a villain within and we usually wear a mask!

Who is the hero within you? It’s that part of our self that strives toward unconditional love, wisdom, success, and self actualization. A few months ago I was late for my first appointment. As I sped down the road I noticed an elderly lady crawling on her hands and knees. I screeched to a stop, went to help her up and walked her back to her door. She had attempted to get her morning paper and fell. That was the hero inside taking time to help a neighbor even though I was running late. Do you recognize the hero inside of yourself? What small and big accomplishments do you give yourself credit for? How can you develop the hero within?

 
No joking, there unfortunately is a joker (villain) in all of us. Sullivan (1953) spoke of the “bad-me”. That part of our self which creates chaos, harms others and makes self destructive choices. The villain in us is usually insecure and afraid of being exposed. We might overindulge in eating, spending, speeding, drinking, or smoking when we know it will harm us. We place ourselves in situations in which we will suffer, be hurt, disappointed or mistreated. Obviously the end result is feeling embarrassed, guilty and humiliated.  

One such episode happened recently when I got a notice in the mail that I was a "habitual violator". I know your getting scared reading this! The "bad me" had four speeding tickets within 12 months and my license was going to be suspended for 90 days. Yikes! Brent (Speedy Gonzales) you NEED BALANCE! Slowing down is a struggle for the "over achiever" in me. But I'm learning. Fortunately I did get a probation period and my wife is rejoicing that she is not driving me around like I'm in junior high. Ha.

Who is that masked man? That’s the lone ranger. Even heroes wear masks. We all hide behind a variety of social masks. I appear strong when I really feel weak. I project success when I really feel like a looser. What masks do you hide behind?  

I personally struggle with “I’m not enough” thinking. I’m not smart enough. I’m not good looking enough. I don’t make enough money. I’m not a good enough husband or father. I’m not funny enough. I’m just not enough. I admit openly this is one of my STRUGGLES and maybe you can relate.  

I’m learning that we can “BALANCE” the hero, the villain and the masks that we wear. It’s o.k. to recognize the hero within, to increase awareness of the “bad-me” and to be vulnerable with who I am behind the mask.

 CLICK HERE to Purchase my NEW e-workbook “Who am I Self Discovery Workbook” for  ONLY $10.00 dollars.

And then

Schedule a FREE 30 minute phone coaching session with Brent!
 

Click the picture to email Brent

Is it true that being a professional is staying focused on your team, your employees and your customers? Of course yet professionalism starts with YOU “being your personal best”! Do you want to know one forgotten way to be your personal and professional best?  

ASK FOR SUPPORT. Yes even heroes need help!

There are three primary kinds of support.

 1) Technical support is sometimes called coaching. You get specific advice or know how. I want to give special credit to my “technical support guru”, Dr. Lee Clayton from Denison. He has helped me with creating this eZine, my shopping cart, my products and I couldn’t do it without him! 

Take my FREE “Do I Need Coaching” test & get your personal results. CLICK HERE.

2) Emotional support is sometimes called counseling/mentoring. You get objective listening, encouragement and feedback. Many times you can get emotional support from a best friend, a family member, a minister or peer but there are times that we need a professional counselor. Solomon said, “Plans fail for lack of counsel but with many advisers they succeed”.

Take my FREE “Do I Need Counseling” test & get your personal results. CLICK HERE.

3) Practical support is someone who actually “helps” you to accomplish a task. A friend of mine hired an organizational expert to organize his home and office. My father in law helped me build my deck. You get the idea. Practical support can be unpaid or paid but it's always priceless!

Remember “asking for help is a sign of strength”! Go ahead I dare you- Ask for help!

Is a person born with a natural funny bone or can they learn how to be funny? I sure don’t have the final funny word but I do believe we all have a genetic predisposition to humor potential and we have the ability to learn how to be more playful. Telling jokes is ONE way to be funny and playful. Since we talked about the “joker” inside each of us in the previous segment I thought it would be appropriate to share some tips on telling jokes.

1. Choose jokes that YOU think are funny!
2. Don’t tell needless information about where your heard the joke.
3. Personalize the joke somehow by making it believable.
4. Tell the joke without DRAGGING it out. Get to the punch line ASAP!
5. Don’t laugh at your own joke, especially in advance.
6. Get more ANIMATED in your voice and body language when telling your joke.
7. If people don’t laugh, move along in the conversation & don’t explain the joke.

Do You Want to Grow Your Humor Potential?

Who Do You Know that Needs Some "Comic Relief"?

Go ahead and buy “Laugh & Get Rich” for $19.95 

If you want other idea’s for fun remember the Laugh & Get Rich book for only $19.95. It has a chapter called “The Nifty Fifty” which has 50 tips, techniques, and strategies to Laugh & Get Rich. The book was written by Loopy Pizzabrain (Rick Segel) & Gidget Liverhumperdink (Darren LaCroix). Have FUN!!

• Do you have a question or comment for Brent?
• Do you or someone you know need professional counseling or coaching?
• Do you or your organization need a speaker or training workshop?

      Contact Brent now!    Visit at:  www.brentspeaks.com