THE BALANCING ACT

Building Balance for Better Living

April 2005

by Brent O'Bannon, MBS

(Author, Speaker, Counselor/Coach)

Read in this edition...

Always Personal...Climbing the ladder of success

Always Professional...The slippery slopes of work

Always Playful...The fun & folly of practical jokes

Have you ever wondered how to climb the ladder of success without getting rung out?

A man's got to do what his mind tells him to. So I climbed 45 scary feet to the top rung and tied off the ladder so it wouldn't fall in the swirling wind. I climbed back down and started my chainsaw. Up, up and away, trembling in my boots I climbed determined to cut the gnarly branches that blocked the sunlight from my swimming pool.

Whether you're trimming trees in your back yard, climbing up the corporate ladder or just trying to live from the tree tops like Tarzan and Jane-Success takes the balance of thoughts, feelings and actions!

Thoughts are the bricks and mortar of struggle or success. I honestly had both thoughts of "I can't climb this ladder" and "I can climb this ladder". It is natural to have a battle of negative self talk and positive self talk. To successfully climb the ladder in life you have to repeat the positive affirmation of "I can climb the ladder"! What is your core thinking? Do you say "I can" or " I can't". Take the first step up the ladder by believing and saying "I can".

Feelings are like the swirling wind. They come and go as they please. Feelings can be pleasant or unpleasant. You cannot stop the wind or feelings but you can navigate through them carefully. Anchor your feelings to your positive thoughts like I tied my ladder to the trunk of the tree to stabilize my assent. What feelings do you struggle with? Are you more controlled by your thoughts or feelings? 

Actions not only speak louder than words but accomplish more than words. I could think all day long I can climb that ladder even though I'm afraid I'm going to fall and never get UP the ladder. You have to force one foot in front of the other to climb each rung of the ladder. Every long journey begins with a single step. Every marathon ends with a step. What steps do you need to begin? What projects do you need to finish? Keep moving up and down that ladder for success.

While I was at the top of the ladder buzzing with my chainsaw I was nervously aware of how much balance I needed. I battled in my mind to say positive thoughts. I felt unpleasant and pleasant feelings as the wind swirled in my face. I forced myself up to the top though my mind told me you're crazy. One large branch came crashing back towards my ladder. If it had not been tied I would have lost my balance and came crashing down. It was an adventure to go 45 feet in the air and it took a balance of thoughts, feelings and actions.

If you want to climb the ladder of success without getting rung out and clear the air for more sunlight in your life then keep balancing your thoughts, feelings and actions.

 Do you need to learn in more detail how to balance your thoughts, feelings and actions?

 Purchase:

The Balancing Act

The 7 Habits of a Balance Master

2 CD Audio set for $29.95

or

 Set up a phone coaching or counseling appointment-

903-819-0301 or brent@brentspeaks.com

My wife and I recently went snow skiing in Monarch Colorado after a 19 year hiatus. I was hesitant because I thought I would get "dangerous" on the slopes and break a few bones at age 41. The couple we traveled with were ready with enthusiasm to slide down the slippery slopes so away we went.

Work balance is a lot like coming down those slippery slopes. The more I skied the more curious I got how people keep their balance on the slopes. I thought of 3 kinds of skiers. Which one do you identify with.

First is the snow plow skier. My wife started out like this one. As she came down the slope her eyes and head were looking straight down at her skies missing the beautiful view of the mountains. She did not pick up any speed because she didn't want to fall. She was overly cautious. She snow plowed all the way down the mountain. She played it safe.

The second kind of skier is the speedster. I was amazed at how little children and teenagers would zoom down the slopes without poles or fear. They were not afraid of falling. In fact they seemed to enjoy the opportunity to fall.

The third kind of skier is the smooth skier. They seemed to be the most balanced. They slide down the slopes with speed, simplicity and serenity. They appeared to be enjoying the journey as well as the challenge with balance.

What kind of worker are you? How do you slide down the slippery slope of work?

Are you like the snow plow skier who goes into work with no eye contact? Cautious, mistrustful and afraid of making a fool of yourself. Your not enjoying your work, your co-workers or your customers. Your afraid of failure. 

Do you go into work like the speedster? Racing through work and oblivious to people around you. Are you so focused on getting in and out that you don't make work meaningful? 

Have you learned how to be the smooth skier? Opening your eyes and going to work with purpose. Enjoying the people and challenges along the way. Knowing when to speed up and when to slow down. Gliding along the way realizing that sometimes you will fall yet learning and continuing down the slippery slope.

Believe me, I'm not the expert skier. I started very cautious and by watching my friend I discovered how to ski more freely as the day went on. I took a few more risks to ski faster, go through some trees and jump a few hills. Of course I fell down and had fun doing so. At the same time I was finding my personal balance on the slippery slopes. Now I want to go skiing every year!

Find your personal balance on the slippery slopes of work and you will work with speed, simplicity and serenity!

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Guess what is one of my most fun holidays? You got it-April Fools!                

April fools day started in the 16th century when the beginning of the year was changed from April 1st to January 1st. Many people were clueless about the change and were made "fools". April 1st became the day to play tricks and pranks for fun.

 Did you play any April fools jokes this year? Send me your practical joke and I might just share it.

I was playfully privileged to be the "jester" for a Toastmaster contest on this years April 1st.  I demonstrated a little magic when I turned a yellow hanker chef into an egg. Someone said, "that's not a real egg". They opened their palms and I dropped the egg yolk into their hands. Of course they whooped and hollered. At least they didn't get egg on their face.

My counseling supervisee and I were meeting on April fools day. I stopped the conversation and said, "Jeff I have something serious we need to talk about". I was notified by my licensing board that I did not turn in the correct paperwork to be your supervisor. That means the last year that I have been supervising you is not going to count toward your supervision hours. I was proud of Jeff as a counselor because he kept objective on the outside though later he told me he was going bonkers on the inside. I then shouted, April fools.

Yes, I'm very mischievous.                  

My last practical joke of the day came when a company representative emailed me asking me to facilitate a workshop for another well known company. I have worked with this gentleman for several years. I emailed him back the following:

Marlin,

I have sad bad news. My truck, which is my only form of transportation was stolen. My wife's car was sucked up in a tornado funnel last night. I'm going CRAZY!!!

I'm sooooo depressed that I can't see myself ever leading another workshop in my miserable existence. Tell the company I'm sorry.

PS-Don't believe a word I said, APRIL FOOLS! Count me in for any company that needs a foolish facilitator!

Marlin emailed me back with these words.

Hi Brent,

That was funny and you had me totally "fished" in until you said you were going crazy.

Thanks I needed a good laugh today. I will definitely recommend YOU as a foolish facilitator always!

I realize that not everyone enjoys practical jokes. It is also true that we can go too far and we must keep the balance with our humor.

The other side of the coin is that humor can help YOU keep the balance!

If you want to add humor/play to your life then buy this book:

• Do you have a question or comment for Brent?
• Do you or someone you know need counseling or coaching?
• Do you or your organization need a speaker/training workshop?

      Contact Brent now!   

  www.brentspeaks.com